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Essay Sample

…By the time the boy reaches adolescence, his relationship to his father is still different. Increasingly the father finds that he cannot retain his intimacy with his son merely by taking an interest in the things he does and occasionally doing them with him. The boy still wants fellowship of a kind. He still wants to bring important questions to his "dad," and he still considers it great sport to go fishing with him or join in a long trip. But somehow the boy's camp where he fishes, swims, and takes trips with other boys rouses his enthusiasm to a pitch not attained when with his father. This is entirely natural, and yet to some fathers it is a matter of keen disappointment. They want to remain "pals" with their boys, and they suffer a humiliating sense of defeat when they fall short of their ideal. The father who joins in the neighborhood gang's ball games in the vacant lot, sweating and puffing but grimly determined to be a "pal" to his youngster, doesn't realize that instead of admiring him as a "good sport" the boys are secretly snickering at his awkwardness and trying to tire him out so he will the sooner leave them alone. Parents who are not genuinely interested in a given activity but try to take part merely because their son or daughter is greatly interested may make some headway, but they are using a difficult method. Young folk are quick to distinguish between real and assumed interest. A more fruitful method is to increase the emphasis on interests already held by both parents and children. If both father and son are keen on making things with tools or on target shooting, such interests form a natural basis for genuine fellowship…

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